Stay at home mom

I never thought it was for me. I am working on my patience, I am young, afraid that I will loose myself, afraid my baby boy will be too attached, and I am afraid I wont accomplish anything. I feel bad for saying that because my house will be clean, my baby and husband will be happy so I guess I will be accomplishing things. School can wait until later but how do I not loose myself? All these reasons to not be a stay at home mommy but just as equally amount of reason's to be a stay at home mommy.